Since times immemorial, in my otherwise short life, I have been nurturing irrepressible urge for the atonement of my past. Driven by the pathetic present and desirous of glorious future, I have analysed my life more than news anchors analyse news reports these days. The infamous ‘Walk of Atonement’ made by Cersei could not even catalyse my cathartic senses. My out of shape body and a sensitive heart would make a disgusting sight warranting yet another walk for this purpose. Life indeed is a vicious circle!
What if I am endowed with the power to amend my past? What if I make it exactly the way I wish it to be while introspecting my present in the hindsight? Sadly, it is not a good idea. It is just like painting a portrait where a beauty is depicted on canvas rather than explored and manifested in a natural manner.
Nothing can be more burdensome than a person’s past. Good or bad, it adds to the present insidiously stunting its natural evolution. Dwelling upon the past results in life immersed in the thoughts of ‘ifs / if nots.’ Inaction has the potential of blunting the sharpest minds. It is the worst dementor that one can think about. Atonement has a sound full of potential to correct all that may ever affect us adversely. Initiating the process is even more difficult. The inertia of familiarity and false ego compounds the problem to uncontrollable rates.
So, is there no way out of the hallowed or harrowing past? The peace and self-saturated status of Allahabad aggravate the pain of those seeking pace or change in their lives. A tinge of patina seems to fade the shine of post-modernist lustre.
A fickle mind, a silent city and very high ambitions.
Is there anything sane in this world which may guide or effectuate my atonement and get me and help me get rid of the Albatross around my neck?
Everyone knows that life is to be lived in the present. Living it, in the same manner, is difficult. I hope to find an answer to this dilemma before it all ends for forever.
– Prashant
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